Top 5 Best Gay Jokes
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Current Rating: 3 The church service was under way and they passed the collection plate. When the preacher saw a $100.00 bill in the collection plate, he stop the service and announced "who ever put the $100.00 bill in the plate please stand up".
A gay man stood up and said "I did".
The preacher told him "since you put that money in the plate I would like to let you pick out three hymes."
Excitedly, the gay guy said, "well I'll take him and him and him."
Current Rating: 2.98 An airline's passenger cabin was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant named Billy, who seemed to put everyone into a good mood as he served them food and drinks.
As the plane prepared to descend, Billy came swishing down the aisle and announced to the passengers, "Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big scary plane shortly, lovely people, so if you could just put up your trays that would be super."
On his trip back up the aisle, he noticed that a well-dressed rather exotic-looking woman hadn't moved a muscle.
"Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines. I asked you to raise your trazy-poo so the main man can pitty-pat us on the ground."
She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country, I am called a Princess. I take orders from no one."
To which the flight attendant replied, without missing a beat, "Well, sweet-cheeks, in my country, I'm called a Queen, so I outrank you. Tray-up bitch."
Current Rating: 2.97 Top Ten Things Heterosexuals Need to Know About Gay People
10. We didn't invent disco music so stop blaming us.
9. We're not sure about Ricky Martin either.
8. We also didn't invent the color black, but we are in complete agreement that you look better in it.
7. We are secretly glad Anne Heche is back on your team. She scares us.
6. Our so-called "gaydar" does not get us more cable stations or better reception.
5. We think your mini-vans are sooo cute!
4. David Crosby was not Melissa Etheridge's only choice.
3. If he's using two or more hair products at any one time -- yes, he is.
2. If she's won Wimbledon sixteen times, she is too.
And, the number one thing that heterosexuals need to know about gay people is...
1. Relax, we don't want you!
Current Rating: 2.97 A gay man goes to the doctor and complains that his husband is losing interest in sex. The doctor gives him a pill, but warns him it is still experimental and tells his to slip it into his mashed potatoes at dinner. So, that night at dinner, he does.
About a week later he's back at the doctor. he says, "Doc, the pill worked great!! I put it in the potatoes like you said! It wasn't five minutes and he jumps up, rakes all the food and dishes on the floor, grabs me, rips all my clothes off and ravages me right there on the table!"
The doctor says, "I'm sorry, we didn't realize the pill was that strong. The foundation will be glad to pay for any damages."
"Naah... ", he says, "that's okay. We aren't going back to that Restaurant anyway."
Current Rating: 2.94 You Know You Live in San Francisco When...
The guy who cuts your hair is straight, and your plumber is gay,
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